Finding My Life Purpose, Finally

Dec 03

2009

Finding My Life Purpose, Finally

by Alexis Martin Neely - Posted in Featured, Personal, Pursuit of Truth, Waking Up |

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Ever since I graduated from law school and began my 6-figure paycheck, big law firm job only to find out it wasn’t at all what I thought it was going to be, I’ve been asking “what’s my purpose? Why am I here? What is this all about?”

Within recent months, it has all started to become more clear than ever before.

I recently began working with Tim Kelley, author of the book “True Purpose”. What’s interesting is I thought I had already found my life purpose and was doing it.

And yet, I felt drawn to Tim’s work. What I now see is that his work is taking me to another, much deeper level of my purpose.

I can now see that every single thing that has ever happened in my life, both those things I deemed to be “good” and those things I deemed to be “bad”, all happened to prepare me to fulfill my purpose as I now understand it in this moment.

Suddenly, it all makes sense.

There was a part of me that always knew this day was coming and I would occasionally catch enough of a glimpse of the future to know it was possible that one day I would really and truly get how everything fit together.

I’m grateful that it’s finally here.

Years of frustration, wonder, worry, uncertainty and fear have evaporated. There are still threads left, but 90% of the concern has disappeared from my awareness.

Ok, so now I’m going to tell you what I now understand to be my purpose, even though I feel slightly embarrassed when I write it out like this.

I am here to shine the light into the dark corners of your business and your life with absolute and total love, acceptance and support.

I make the hard things easier.

Specifically, at this moment in time, I am focusing this purpose around business by helping people take a look at the things we all avoid because they are hard – the difficult conversations, the business of your business, the financials, the legal stuff, the employee stuff, the partnership stuff, the pending business break-up.

You know, the hard parts of being a business owner. The stuff I can’t stand either. Office politics, drama, conflict. Ick.

I take the ick out and help you to discover how whatever is happening in your business is your greatest opportunity for growth.

You really want to be a conscious business owner? For real?

Then, you’ve got to open your eyes, wake up to the truth. Shine the light into the darkness. The part you’ve been avoiding because it’s too hard, painful, difficult, embarrassing, shameful, guilt-ful, to look at.

When you are willing to open your eyes and shine the light into the dark corners, you will naturally run your business from a more expanded and enlightened perspective.

It’s hard to be enlightened and aware with your eyes closed and the lights off, right?

Decisions become much easier. You no longer worry about getting taken advantage of or what’s real and what’s not. When you can see, you know.

Boundaries are easily established and conflicts are handled with an open heart.

Wow, it feels great to finally get all this. These, of course, are my personal greatest life lessons so far.

6 years ago, I was attending a workshop held by one of my early coaches. Scott had brought in a purpose expert named Kevin M McCarthy, author of the On Purpose Person. And he walked us through a process to help us discover our own purpose.

What came through to me back then made no sense in the context of my life at the time. I had just started my own law firm. I was committed to being a lawyer. Helping my clients. Making a difference in their lives.

But, when I did Kevin’s process, I discovered my purpose was to “Shine the Light?!?” Huh?

WTF?

I was a lawyer. I didn’t know how to shine no stinkin’ light. What was I supposed to do with that? Shine the light?!? Um, ok.

But, there was a part of me that knew that was it and one day I’d figure out what it meant.

For the past 6 years, I’ve continued to put one foot in front of the other, learning how to move with my energy and get out of my own way. It’s been a learning process for sure. But, each step fo the way I trusted that if I just kept asking the right questions and moving forward, I’d one day get it.

And now I do.

Are you ready to know it too? I know you are. And you know you want it.

To begin, start to ask yourself what you’ve been avoiding. What are the conversations you’ve had in your head, but you have held back from having with the person they really need to be with? What are the things you know you need to do in your business, but haven’t done because they seem too hard?

Make a list of those things. Bring them to awareness. That’s all you have to do now. It’s the first step and in some ways the most difficult.

« Wait, Stop the Train! I Want to Get OFF. :) | Asking the Hard Questions »

http://twitter.com/kevinwmccarthy Kevin W. McCarthy

Hi Alexis!

I came across this post with a measure of delight and disappointment. Delight that you are living into your purpose. Disappointment that you never followed up with me regarding your purpose if you were confused.

Your concepts of purpose are still a few degrees off the mark. For example, you're mixing up purpose, vision, mission, and values. Also, your work is an expression of your purpose, not your purpose.

Bravo for persisting!

Get back in touch and let's get you fully aligned and on-purpose.

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin
http://twitter.com/MamaBritt Britt Michaelian

Lex, honey you are amazing. And you are on a friggin role right now! GREAT writing and some fantastically profound insights on your blog these days. I mean, you are writing this and I am thinking about how you have not only shined your light on my business from the moment that I met you (was it 2 or 3 years ago?), but you have shined your light on a big part of my life. THANK YOU!

I am so honored to have witnessed an almost tangible transformation in you during the time that I have known you. What an amazing mom, friend and coach you are. We are all so blessed to have you here. You are a thought leader and a spiritual inspiration rolled into one sparkling little package. And you are there because you have done the work. You have opened your eyes and you have gone there. You walk the walk, girlie and you do it with grace. There aren't many like you.

I don't think that I am alone when I say that I cannot wait to see where your path leads you because judging from the time that I have known you, it won't be long before the world knows about you. And that's a great thing. The world needs your light Thank you for leading the way!
http://twitter.com/kevinwmccarthy Kevin W. McCarthy

Hi Alexis!

I came across this post with a measure of delight and disappointment. Delight that you are living into your purpose. Disappointment that you never followed up with me regarding your purpose if you were confused.

Your concepts of purpose are still a few degrees off the mark. For example, you're mixing up purpose, vision, mission, and values. Also, your work is an expression of your purpose, not your purpose.

Bravo for persisting!

Get back in touch and let's get you fully aligned and on-purpose.

Be On-Purpose!
Kevin
brittmichaelian

Lex, honey you are amazing. And you are on a friggin role right now! GREAT writing and some fantastically profound insights on your blog these days. I mean, you are writing this and I am thinking about how you have not only shined your light on my business from the moment that I met you (was it 2 or 3 years ago?), but you have shined your light on a big part of my life. THANK YOU!

I am so honored to have witnessed an almost tangible transformation in you during the time that I have known you. What an amazing mom, friend and coach you are. We are all so blessed to have you here. You are a thought leader and a spiritual inspiration rolled into one sparkling little package. And you are there because you have done the work. You have opened your eyes and you have gone there. You walk the walk, girlie and you do it with grace. There aren't many like you.

I don't think that I am alone when I say that I cannot wait to see where your path leads you because judging from the time that I have known you, it won't be long before the world knows about you. And that's a great thing. The world needs your light Thank you for leading the way!
http://topsy.com/tb/feedproxy.google.com/~r/TheIntrepidEntrepreneur/~3/N5zoyWTnsuQ Tweets that mention Finding My Life Purpose, Finally — The Intrepid Mompreneur — Topsy.com

[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Kim DeYoung, Shae Bynes. Shae Bynes said: Another awesome post from an awesome mompreneur @AlexisNeely | Finding my Life Purpose, Finally… http://bit.ly/937yhd [...]
http://www.elbeeservicesllc.com/ Lalitha Brahma

I love this article. It was wonderful watching you in Ali'c Diamond member interview. Wish you all the best
chuckblakeman

Alexis,

I'm excited for you. We all need a Big Why that crystallizes into a clear vision that creates Marching Orders (a mission) for us. You are doing what so few will do – get moving.

There's no such thing as a good plan on paper. The only way to make your bad plan good is to get moving and it will become good as you move. I'm looking forward to seeing how your movement creates your vision and your Big Why! Please keep me posted.
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

Thank you Kevin. I've worked with a series of coaches over the past 6 years each coming at the perfect time to offer exactly what was needed. It was not possible for me to have anymore clarity than I received back then at that time. Every single thing I've experienced since then has shed the light I needed to step into who I am today.

I'm currently doing the deepest purpose work I've ever done with Tim Kelley and it's phenomenal. What I've shared here on the blog is just the beginning of that work that is helping me understand not just my purpose, but my essence, my blessing and my mission. As I continue my work with Tim, I will post much of it here and I will always appreciate your thoughts about it.

Warmest regards,
Alexis
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

Ah Britt, thank you for being the witness and holding the space. It's always supportive friends like you who ease the way, for sure. Mwah.
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

I will not only keep you posted (literally via my blog posts!), but I will plan to see you and speak to your group when I arrive in Colorado! Thanks so much for the support.
http://twitter.com/TaiGoodwin Tai Goodwin

Very inspiring post. Thanks for being so open and honest. I'm at a similar place and my gut tells me I'm right on the verge of getting there.
http://www.elbeeservicesllc.com/ Lalitha Brahma

I love this article. It was wonderful watching you in Ali'c Diamond member interview. Wish you all the best
chuckblakeman

Alexis,

I'm excited for you. We all need a Big Why that crystallizes into a clear vision that creates Marching Orders (a mission) for us. You are doing what so few will do – get moving.

There's no such thing as a good plan on paper. The only way to make your bad plan good is to get moving and it will become good as you move. I'm looking forward to seeing how your movement creates your vision and your Big Why! Please keep me posted.
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

Thank you Kevin. I've worked with a series of coaches over the past 6 years each coming at the perfect time to offer exactly what was needed. It was not possible for me to have anymore clarity than I received back then at that time. Every single thing I've experienced since then has shed the light I needed to step into who I am today.

I'm currently doing the deepest purpose work I've ever done with Tim Kelley and it's phenomenal. What I've shared here on the blog is just the beginning of that work that is helping me understand not just my purpose, but my essence, my blessing and my mission. As I continue my work with Tim, I will post much of it here and I will always appreciate your thoughts about it.

Warmest regards,
Alexis
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

Ah Britt, thank you for being the witness and holding the space. It's always supportive friends like you who ease the way, for sure. Mwah.
http://twitter.com/AlexisNeely Alexis Martin Neely

I will not only keep you posted (literally via my blog posts!), but I will plan to see you and speak to your group when I arrive in Colorado! Thanks so much for the support.
http://twitter.com/TaiGoodwin Tai Goodwin

Very inspiring post. Thanks for being so open and honest. I'm at a similar place and my gut tells me I'm right on the verge of getting there.
prosperitygal

Alexis:

I have seen you on the horizon for a little bit and just now took the time to come and see your work. My friend Brian Williams expressed you were awesome.

Thanks for showing me that I can be as transparent in my work/blog/radio show. I share quite a bit, hoping they will see themselves and take action.

I really relate with you discussing Shining your light, as it is what my clients have shared about me that they “see”. Funny how even when we know on one level we are powerful we need to have nurturing environments to help us continue to rise to our own awesomeness.

Thanks for being open, I appreciate it.
prosperitygal

Alexis:

I have seen you on the horizon for a little bit and just now took the time to come and see your work. My friend Brian Williams expressed you were awesome.

Thanks for showing me that I can be as transparent in my work/blog/radio show. I share quite a bit, hoping they will see themselves and take action.

I really relate with you discussing Shining your light, as it is what my clients have shared about me that they “see”. Funny how even when we know on one level we are powerful we need to have nurturing environments to help us continue to rise to our own awesomeness.

Thanks for being open, I appreciate it.
kendraethornbury

dear alexis~ i just love you. you are shining the light just by being you. by sharing with such honesty and transparency- you shine light, you illuminate. authenticity is a light we can all follow. thank you. thank you for getting the simplicity of leading through BEING.

and congrats on declaring your purpose as you know it now! it's a rockin' mission… the terrain of the dark places are so misunderstood and underutilized as a source of expansion and growth. i'm leading a seminar later today on fear and how it sabotages aliveness. it is an example of the “dark” that can be a gateway to thriving when we learn how to be with it. thank you for creating the safety and acceptance for people to navigate it.

WAHOOO!

in joy and gratitude,
kendra

ps. i'd like to just put another opinion into the mix re: what kevin said about being a bit of the mark. i've done strategic planning for years with groups…. and there are slight variations on the definitions of purpose, mission, values, etc. i think people get too caught in the semantics and the “right” way to do it. when it comes down to it…. ONLY YOU KNOW what feels right. it's about getting clear about who you are and declaring the expression of life that is yours to deliver as a gift to the world while being the most joyous, content and fulfilled being you know you are here to experience. from the newest level of clarity, more is revealed….
http://www.spiritalive.net Kendra E Thornbury

dear alexis~ i just love you. you are shining the light just by being you. by sharing with such honesty and transparency- you shine light, you illuminate. authenticity is a light we can all follow. thank you. thank you for getting the simplicity of leading through BEING.

and congrats on declaring your purpose as you know it now! it's a rockin' mission… the terrain of the dark places are so misunderstood and underutilized as a source of expansion and growth. i'm leading a seminar later today on fear and how it sabotages aliveness. it is an example of the “dark” that can be a gateway to thriving when we learn how to be with it. thank you for creating the safety and acceptance for people to navigate it.

WAHOOO!

in joy and gratitude,
kendra

ps. i'd like to just put another opinion into the mix re: what kevin said about being a bit of the mark. i've done strategic planning for years with groups…. and there are slight variations on the definitions of purpose, mission, values, etc. i think people get too caught in the semantics and the “right” way to do it. when it comes down to it…. ONLY YOU KNOW what feels right. it's about getting clear about who you are and declaring the expression of life that is yours to deliver as a gift to the world while being the most joyous, content and fulfilled being you know you are here to experience. from the newest level of clarity, more is revealed….
Elizabeth Vaughan

Alexis, I think this is an amazing example of the fact that when someone finds their purpose, it's a win for the world as well as for the individual. I think the insights you've found will fill a big gap in the business world, particularly for women business owners. Many of the coaches and business-book authors I've encountered talk as if the emotional life of the business owner and the success of the business are entirely separate things, and that to be truly “professional” one must behave as if one has no emotions. But as you've highlighted, so many emotions and beliefs can block business success — guilt, shame, poor self-esteem, fear of uncertainty, etc. By addressing the human being and not just the businessperson, I think you will be doing the world a great service.
Elizabeth Vaughan

Alexis, I think this is an amazing example of the fact that when someone finds their purpose, it's a win for the world as well as for the individual. I think the insights you've found will fill a big gap in the business world, particularly for women business owners. Many of the coaches and business-book authors I've encountered talk as if the emotional life of the business owner and the success of the business are entirely separate things, and that to be truly “professional” one must behave as if one has no emotions. But as you've highlighted, so many emotions and beliefs can block business success — guilt, shame, poor self-esteem, fear of uncertainty, etc. By addressing the human being and not just the businessperson, I think you will be doing the world a great service.
http://www.alexismartinneely.com/its-all-falling-together/ It’s All Falling …. Together « Life, Business, and the Pursuit of Truth

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http://twitter.com/ElenaVerlee Elena Verlee

Alexis – you truly shine the light. I am so thrilled to work with you, knowing you have walked the path before me and understand all that I am going through. Thanks for the inspiration and guidance.
http://naijapreneur.com/purpose-of-entrepreneurship Tito

Great Post Lex,
Finding ones purpose takes a whole lot of persistence and soul searching, I guess we all need someone to walk us through the process one way or the other. I'm glad you are well on track, congrats dear!