The Whole Truth

Before my son was born, I worked in corporate america traveling the world working insane hours. Then when he was born gave it up, and decided to start a home business. I don’t know how I do it, but I don’t do everything. I was never cut out to be a “housewife”, was always working so never had time to cook and clean, so still other people do that. My husband cooks and does most of the shopping, I have a cleaning lady once a week, I am always behind on laundry, I don’t get alot of sleep, I work when my son in napping or asleep, I respond to e-mail on my blackberry, my son does entertain himself so I get a little done, we do date night once a week, eat dinner as a family every night, one computer free night per week, son goes to school 2 days-that is when i run errands and go to gym, one weekly playdate, one day home with him to relax, and thankfully my husband lets me sleep in on the weekends!!

Love to hear how you do it, i am still trying to figure it out!

I find the whole “mompreneuer” movement amazing. I was in a meeting in Orange County, CA a few weeks back and found out from one of the top Internet Marketers in the world that a large percentage of content that is created for Internet Marketers is actually created by well educated stay at home moms that supplement their income in such a way. Not fascinating that this occurs. But, fascinating that it is becoming a sort of cottage industry. I have a research project underway concerning this subject and it ought to be interesting what we learn. Thanks for the great work Alexis.

Keeping it all together as an entrepreneur and mom is always a work in progress. As an organizer I struggle to be perfect for everyone and many days I feel like I fall short of that goal. I try to get as much help as possible for the tasks I hate like cleaning and laundry and have put effective systems in place to keep house running smoothly. Unfortunately, the ultimate childcare solution has yet to present itself. A really good sitter service would be a welcome recommendation.

i type with one hand while 2 yo eats cereal sitting on my lap.
i do 1 minute of work then play 1 minute of Twister with my 4yo.
i edit an essay for my law school admission consulting clients, then tweet, then check Facebook, then start all over again with the editing.
My secrets to being a full time WAHM? Having an au pair (see Culturalcare.com for more info) and a personal assistant and a virtual assistant and a marketing manager and a web campaign manager so I can do my own blogging and client work.

My husband is a Stay-At-Home Dad. My kids watch a lot more TV than I’d like. And, if I had 185 emails every day…I’d probably have to pay someone else to handle that.

I don’t do any of all that I do really well. My kids are 4-12, so it makes all the difference in the world now that they are able to follow their own chore and other responsibility lists and be held accountable for them. I just have to actually be consistent with checking in and providing the accountability — that’s the biggest problem with that system .

I do have a little bit of childcare, and occasional house cleaning too. But my dream is to actually have a Spanish speaking nanny help out and cook some dinners too.

The biggest challenge is them seeing me right there in the home and not realizing I am working, so they interrupt constantly, and I feel bad. The time is quite inefficient then, because of the constant shift of attention — not to mention exhausting in a sort of “constant noise” sort of way.

Here’s what I’ve recently discovered, Alexis – the more successful I become, the more help I need.

My kids are almost 4 and 15 mo – and no, they don’t entertain themselves for more than two minutes at at time, so I work when they sleep, which means naptime and nighttime – so no, I don’t get a lot of sleep…

We have no family nearby and since we’ve never done the playgroup thing, my resources for recommended babysitters is nil.

I couldn’t have created the success I have now without the support of my husband, who fully embraces his dad role and allows me time to get stuff done whenever possible – and still…

Does that stuff include housekeeping? Ah no – (one of my goals for 2009 is to hire Alice from the Brady Bunch). I do what I must, James does more, and the rest… well, I wouldn’t eat off my floors.

But wanting it ‘all’ means that when I have an hour, my focus goes to my highest priority. I don’t have the luxury of picking and choosing from my to-do list. Whatever must get done NOW rises to the top. Although my best energy may not be with the task at hand, I’m much more productive this way than I was for the 5 years I worked for myself before I had kids!

Oh, and hey – there’s nothing wrong with an hour (or so…) of Noggin.

Love the image and can’t wait to here how you do it…

Cheers,
~ A

PS: 436 emails are waiting in my inbox right now that need to be Deleted, Delegated, Moved (to appropriate folder), or Responded to… this is my biggest time-suck… and one of the biggest reason to find that ‘partner’ for your team…

I’m a single mom of a teenaged boy AND the caregiver for my elderly father who moved in with me after my Mom died last year. It has been a challenge to be in a “sandwich” situation, still caring for a child and now caring for a parent. (And believe me teenagers need just as much attention than smaller kids! – It’s just a different type of attention). I’ve realized something’s gotta give sooner than later as my father is becoming more demanding.

Today, my son and I headed out to the library so he can study (he’s in AP classes and the course material is challenging) and I can work without my Dad’s interruptions.

In general my days start at 6 am, and after I drop my son off, I exercise, check email and start working. Most client calls, networking, training events (including webinars I teach) are usually during “work hours”, but I do a lot of email, administrative work, and writing in the evening after everyone else is in bed.

I know that I work MORE hours than when I was in the corporate world, but I have more flexibility which is a big bonus for me. I also realize that having my father has increased the load so I need to find some options for him, i.e. part-time caregiver, daycare for seniors, etc.

Thanks for the blog post, I enjoy reading everyone’s challenges and solutions!

[...] Yesterday, I started a post that ended with me asking how you do it. [...]

Two words: au pair. Well, actually it’s more like 3 people: au pair, cleaning lady, gardener. For me at least, that’s how I do it. The gardener because I love to be able to play outside with my kids, the cleaning lady because I honestly just hate to vacuum, and the au pair because I wanted my kids to be able to have one person that cares for them when I can’t – instead of a string of babysitters.

I’ve heard great things about Cultural Care but I got mine through Au Pair Care, worth checking out both. She does light housekeeping like the kids’ laundry and picking up after them, you’d be surprised how much less there is to do when someone else puts away the ridiculously number of legos we seem to have aquired.

I find the whole “mompreneuer” movement amazing. I was in a meeting in Orange County, CA a few weeks back and found out from one of the top Internet Marketers in the world that a large percentage of content that is created for Internet Marketers is actually created by well educated stay at home moms that supplement their income in such a way. Not fascinating that this occurs. But, fascinating that it is becoming a sort of cottage industry. I have a research project underway concerning this subject and it ought to be interesting what we learn. Thanks for the great work Alexis.